Minecraft is the insanely popular sanbox game from the swedish developer Mojang. It is currently running in a beta. But anyone can buy and download it for 25% off of the sale price when it comes out in November. Anyways enough with the boring description. You want to know how I fail at Minecraft.
I tried to avoid the hype but I couldn’t last, the numerous posts on Reddit and advice from people in real life caused me to fall for Minecraft’s creeper claws. I had quite a few problems with the game before it even started. My current computer is a Hp Mini 311. Admittedly, it’s a little under powered. It is one step above a netbook. So I can’t say I expect all games to run at one hundred frames per second. But I said to myself “look the art is all pixelated why would it need a good computer to play it on? That would be silly”. So I forged on entered my paypal details and hoped for the best. (Okay, I actually did check the system requirements but they were innacurate).
I downloaded the game. Logged in and was confronted with a screen to name my world. I quickly deleted the place holder “New World” and replace it with “Brave New World“. Why? Because I can. It takes a minute or two to get everything running and it drops me in the randomly generated game world. I look around and my frame rate drops to nearly zero. I back out of the game and type into google.
After some failed attempts and repeated google searches I found out how to mod the game and add some changes that would increase my frame rate. (if you need some help check out Optifine and one of the various mod loaders. Downloading optifine seemed to help a little bit and increased my framerates. My first of many obstacles was overcome. Now Minecraft was playable.
I booted up Minecraft and landed back in Brave New World. I looked around and said to myself ”What am I supposed to do? Where are all those cool creations that are found on youtube?”. I alt-tabbed out of minecraft and started googling. I found out I need to cut down trees and build a house. Why did nobody tell me this? I started on my way, but was too slow to create a house before dark and I was killed by some exploding thing. Another lesson I learned the hard way. Things kill you in Minecraft. Again I rage quit.
The lure of the building blocks and /r/minecraft brought me back to Minecraft within minutes. I was determined to set everything right. Cue montage. I chopped down trees, I ate my lunch and built myself a wonderful cave home. Like a Minecrafting BOSS.
That’s all I really got done in my first day. I am now in an endless cycle of wishing I actually had enough resources to build something, and then getting lost in the unexplored abyss that is my minecraft world. Hopefully I will find some redstone dust in the next century. Until then I will keep cutting down trees and being killed by random creepers.
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